When my mom passed earlier this year, I had the honor of picking out her dress. It wasn’t initially planned that way as my dad had already ordered her burial clothing. I was surprised to learn that you can purchase everything you need from the funeral home. It saves a lot of valuable time while you are going through the grieving process, but you will pay out the nose for that convenience! Everything was on their list for purchase, except an ELEGANT dress. My mother had always been classy and there wasn’t a day in which, even after she’d survived many strokes, she did not have her make up on. She even learned how to apply her makeup with one hand after losing the use of one entire side of her body.
Mom had already been non weight-bearing for quite a while before she passed. I am sure she missed wearing her classy outfits as much as I missed seeing her wear them! I could trip and fall in my mind, just looking at the high heels she could wear! I decided to ask permission to purchase a dress that she would have actually worn. It might sound weird, but I wanted her to be buried in a dress that represented who she was for the majority of her life! I knew this would make her happy! He agreed and as much as I hate shopping, I was very excited about this shopping excursion. I sat through tons of traffic (literally that California traffic is CRA-ZEE!) to get to one of her favorite stores, Macy’s! She shopped there so often that I wouldn’t be surprised if she owned stock in the company! I knew I had my work cut out for me, finding the perfect dress in her favorite color, pink!
Three stores and several hours later, we found it! (shown above!). Of course, an elegant dress needs matching accessories! I’d worn myself out at the initial three stores and my patience was wearing thin. Accessories would have to happen another day. A few days later we had everything we needed! I was on Cloud nine, until I made it to the funeral home three days later! Apparently there is a DRESS CODE for the deceased! The dress I’d purchased broke the first two rules of many. It could not be low-cut, and her arms could not be shown publicly. Those were the most important features of a dress that represented her! By the time I was done reading over the rules, I knew I had to take the dress back. At first I was annoyed because I felt like loved ones should be buried however the family wanted. If the family were paying for it (usually going into debt with those outrageous fees), why did what they were wearing matter! However, I reminded myself that rules were usually made for a reason. Someone either screwed something up, or an unexpected situation arose that probably involved a lawsuit. Just like the dress code for the living, it only takes one bad apple to ruin a good thing for the deceased!