There are several types of improvements women focus on post divorce, not just physical appearance. It might have been shallow, but in the past I wondered why some women bloomed after the ink has dried, as if their appearance was not a concern during marriage. That is, until I became one of “those women”. Once the anger and sadness dulled to a low hum (after the ink dried on my own paperwork), I slowly came out of my coma and began to focus on the world around me. Going through the motions of life with my sole purpose being to make it through the day became a memory. Things and people started to matter again, the world no longer revolved around my pain.
I began to receive compliments about how happy I looked, which fascinated me as these admirers had no idea I was no longer married. Of course, this over-thinker had to analyze that. Wasn’t I supposed to be miserable now that I only require a table for one? Maybe checking the divorced status box didn’t look as bad as it appeared in my mind. (Why is it even an option, single or married really covers all categories). My conclusion: When my marriage dissolved in my mind, even before the initial terrifying step was taken, it took all of my energy to just keep up the facade. I didn’t make time for self-care, I was too busy being a victim which takes a lot of effort. Once I decided to step into my authentic self and leave the past behind, self-improvement was a natural transition. I was no longer drowning in a toxic relationship and could focus on my needs. I looked happier simply because I was.
The post-divorce improvement didn’t stop with appearance, it overlapped into my physical environment (other areas of my life as well, but that’s a blog for another day). I’m in the process of creating peace and clearing out negative energy that took up residence in my home when I was out of balance. My spirit is drawn to the Feng-Shui method, said to improve the quality of life by aligning personal energy or (chi) with environmental energies as a path to success and prosperity. The possibilities excite me! Attached is the article I’m currently using as a guide, and my next step will be to download the Feng-Shui Compass which makes suggestions based on the specific dimensions of my home. Pretty cool!