Today on another forum, I came across a POWERFUL blog by a 61-year-old male ( because it was a breath of fresh air) regarding the beauty of middle-aging women. My favorite line, although there were several nuggets of wisdom is, “” A woman who is about 50 or 55 will appeal to me best. That’s when they really know some things about life.” Responses from mature women who have experienced this dating dilemma (or is it?) ranged from continual anger at the opposite sex to losing their sense of self-worth over it. Some feel “less than” based on being turned away simply because of age.
I’ve also noticed men, (not all) in my 50 plus age bracket either preferring younger women or are only interested in sex, not commitment. This last nugget of wisdom was surprising so I questioned a few men since I will never be able to think like one. It would certainly make the process easier if I could! The consensus was libido is still high so preference is those who have not gone through the change of life. There is an assumption that sex will be infrequent based on this stage of life. I’ve no personal opinion, nor do I feel like I have the right to judge because men and women both want what we want.
I responded, and sharing my thoughts with other women that might be challenged with aging AND dating consecutively.
It is a rare occasion that I run into a man who appreciates who I am at THIS age and more importantly, the life lessons which renders me more of an asset than ANY PYT (Pretty Young Thing). When shyt gets real, I can handle it and my partner will be able to count on me to take care of business IF/WHEN he needs me too. I’ve learned a few things about life!
Aging is interesting, and I’m becoming acutely aware of it these days. I notice more silver in my hair each week (which I only consider wisdom and will never color), the increased number of medicine bottles in my cabinet (thankfully most are allergy related!), and experience a few more aches and pains on some days than others simply when rolling out of bed which sometimes has to be done in stages, lol…Indigestion alone is a BEAST! Why can’t I have the occasional treat without paying for it at least two days, lol….finally, the occasional surgeries thanks to genetics are a B&^^!!).
I will say, however, that I’ve never felt MORE beautiful at 51 than I ever have in my entire life! I won’t ever have the perfect body (even though eating healthy and working out three days a week is a priority) and things will always droop, but I am a total package and a better version of myself at this age than I ever was as a young adult.
While it bothers some that men in our age bracket prefer younger women, it doesn’t concern me (although shocking to see when I returned to dating). As long as I know my value, that’s all that matter. During service on Sunday, the topic appropriately being Singles and Dating, the First Lady said something to the effect of when men can’t see our worth/value, we need to introduce him to it. I agree, and also understand that it doesn’t mean he will stick around to be enrolled in the process. We make choices based on our own personal life filters so what I consider valuable to relationships isn’t the same for everyone. I get it, so try not to waste energy on things I have no control over. There is too much life to live and too many valuable people to meet.” Personal preferences are simply a fact of life.
My personal opinion is that 51 looks good on me! I am aging with grace and improving year after year! It might be a while before I find my HE, but until then, I will continue to enjoy the gift that life is!