Daily Post

Paper

The sun embraced the horizon as I printed out the ten multicolored FPU graduation certificates. The Kinko’s high-quality card-stock paper is ideal due to its thickness and flexibility over similar options and is as important as the ceremony itself based on what it represents. Although the words on the diploma will be forever engraved into the memory of the recipients, they carry more weight when used as a visual anchor. The nine weeks of intense training will cease tomorrow, the Gazelles will branch out on their own and either sink or swim. When the water ahead gets rocky, the life jacket will deploy for those in danger of drowning now that they have declared civil war against debt.

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When asked if I am compensated for my time, I’m faced with a blank stare when I share that while there is definite value in Coordinating FPU, it isn’t monetary. They can’t sink their teeth into the fact that it’s a huge honor for Coordinators to be a part of changing lives and legacies. That is the only form of payment I need. Paper Benjamin’s can’t even compare to the physical and mental rewards received from volunteering.

Daily Post

Meddle

Meddling and motherhood are as natural a combination as breathing. Often we plow headfirst into the lives of our children without allowing them the dignity to make their own choices. When this occurs with adult children, we are usually making the wrong decision even though it might be for the right reason (coming from a place of love). We want to prevent their dance with the devil and the accompanying third-degree burns previously earned from our own private lessons.

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It was hard to accept that I can’t possibly know what’s right for everyone else, even my own flesh and blood. Sometimes I might be certain I do and want to share against my better judgment (usually when it was a prior self-inflicted wound I’d survived), but I’ve learned making decisions based on emotions will lead to scar tissue for all parties involved. The best course of action (for me) is to allow the pain and consequences to occur, rather than to meddle and risk damage to our relationship. One thing for sure, pain can be an effective motivator!

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What I felt was coming from love, was really a boundary issue.  By not allowing children to make their own choices and suffer the consequences, I was really doing them a disservice.

Daily Post

Relieved

My heart overflowed with pride, admiration, and love the day my son left childish things behind and transitioned into being responsible for his own future. He was an anomaly, a high school grad voluntarily placing life on a temporary hiatus while holding down two jobs. In addition, he carried a full load and maintained the required G.P.A. (each semester) needed to retain his academic college scholarship.

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Over the years I watched his transformation from boy to man from the sidelines, learning to make decisions based on his long term goals instead of short term, temporary thrills. I picked up a third job to assist in his efforts to graduate college debt free and when he walked across the stage last year I was relieved! His life was just beginning and at 49, so was mine.