The QUEEN was worthy of a blog ALL of her own! This is my favorite “ASCEND” quote, also a topic broken down during POWERFUL fellowship over the last few weeks. I’m guilty of allowing distractions to alter my path after becoming fruitful in certain areas of my life. As Pastor Moore mentioned, this is possible when we are still tossing out fishing nets and haven’t completely figured out who WE are! The same God I prayed to that created the miracles experienced in my life today, is the exact same God I need to continue to praise after the pressures of life slow their course.
As I took in and sifted through info while attending my Landmark transformational seminar, I experienced an awakening. It was one of several breakthroughs experienced over the 3.5 day AMAZING seminar! In spite of various self-help programs participated in that inspired growth by leaps and bounds over the last century, I’d overlooked (or maybe wasn’t ready for?) something important. While proud of the huge increase in my level of communication skills and willingness to agree to disagree (when I needed to be right all the time in the past), I’d unintentionally participated in fraudulent activity.
I wasn’t satisfied in a few key relationships in my life, but didn’t share how they were occurring for me. I’d attempt to bring up my challenge, and would then shut down in frustration when I couldn’t effectively get my point across. Because I was already always listening in the past (listening only to respond but not actually HEARING what was being said), the new version of me post self-help groups overcompensated. The pendulum swung too far to the left and I no longer expressed myself. This was a hard pill to swallow and I realized I had taken a backwards step directly into the victim mentality. In the end it seemed easier to keep the peace.
Reality was highly disappointing. Based on my open mind and willingness to change, I assumed I would be able to communicate with anyone and everyone. What I’ve learned is that I can’t expect others to react to my training simply because I’ve placed value on the opposite opinion and became willing to agree to disagree and move on. I can have an opinion but I don’t know what’s right for others. The last time I checked, I was not GOD. Once this epiphany downloaded, I was encouraged to cease the fraudulent activity by finally speaking my truth in the areas needed. Although the hope was that after expressing myself fully I could create new, authentic relationships, that didn’t happen (thankfully we were warned of this ahead of time). I did experience that level of completeness after speaking my unsaid, however. Emotional weight I didn’t even realize I was carrying was immediately lifted! I guess it’s true what Iyanla VanZant says, “you have to meet people where they are, and sometimes you have to leave them there!”
I’ve been marinating in this word uncomfortably since sunrise. I wasn’t sure why, but I couldn’t follow my normal routine of finding expressive words that inspire, motivate and touch my heart when hours are precious commodities! When I don’t know what I don’t know, I attempt to patiently wait for the answer to download. If I force the process, I will miss whatever message the universe is attempting to share.
The download occurred and the message received was that it’s impossible for me to live an exceptional life while trying to stay afloat using Samsonite as a life line! Major accomplishments only became possible after acknowledging that some really shitty events took place (as they do for everyone), but that doesn’t mean they are to be used as a crutch to prevent forward movement. Choosing to live an exceptional life that allows me to use my past only to motivate and inspire is the choice I’ve made! It’s great to have choices!